MyPUAJourney Forum

i been talkin to this girl hb8 for about 2 months but always find myself having a conversation about her ex....... what are some opinions on how to switch this into a topic that can get me the girl

sounds like your off to a bad start already, maybe, she's not in a place right now to pursue a relationship with you, though if thats not good enough advice for you.

try talking about your adventures, and your past exploits, you know DHV, show her your more than just a shoulder to cry on, and frankly stop letting her cry on your shoulder, thats what her girlfriends are for...

(However suddenly shifting your persona would be a bad thing, its gotta be a gradual change, or maybe remove yourself from the situation for awhile, and when you come back, act like the man you wanna be. instead of the wuss she's using as a blanket right now )

A few thoughts:

How is she bringing up her ex? Is it in a wistful "Oh gee, he was really great, why did it end?" or maybe "He was such an asshole..". She may be watching for your response to see if you'll qualify yourself for her. ie, it could be a test. Don't play that game with her, it's bullshit that leads nowhere, instead, I'd agree with whatever she's telling you she hates about him - in a joking manner and change the subject.

ie:

her: "My last boyfriend was so possessive!"

me: "Oh! you should never date me then, I'd call you all the time, in fact, I'd probably bug your car and have you followed by some guy in a dark trenchcoat who would tell me all the naughty things you did that day."

Then maybe try to spin that into all the naughty things you think she might have done. Frame her either how you would want her to be with you, or in a funny way. (Yeah, he'd probably tell me about all the circus performers you slept with. God girl, the things you did on a trapeeze should be illegal!)

The point is turn the conversation away from her ex, and make the new conversation more interesting / moving you toward your goal of seducing her / framing her as your girlfriend / whatever.

If she insists on talking about her ex, there's probably a hangup there that you don't want to get in the middle of. To paraphrase for ShaMaN - You don't want to become her emotional tampon. If she persists, then you might just be honest with her and in a very canibus-y fashion tell her "I'm not interested in talking about this." or if necessary "Do you want to live your life in your past, or move on?" Either are fairly ballsy, but if you find that they seem like the only real options to get her to shut up about mr. wonderful or mr. asshole, then it might be time to consider finding a different girl to spend your time with anyway, so they're worth saying to her.

Temper this with the situation she's telling you about him though. If it's in comfort, and she's not ALWAYS bringing it up, she may just be trying to share some experiences that she holds close to her heart, and is only seeking comfort with you - that's a good thing. If you answer like I mentioned above, then you're not going to come off as a smooth alpha, rather as an asshole. If you're in comfort and she brings it up, listen, and then share your own story about an ex, and then move on to another topic, but don't dwell too long in ex-ville or you risk her seeing you as a friend/confidant, and your chances of being more than a friend begin to plummet.

My 2 cents.

fuck her, give her up, she aint worth it. she already seen you as friends only zone. two months is way too long to change shit.

a girl will make an impression on whether you are lover and friend material within the first 3 minutes of interaction, maybe even before then. her image of you is too strong to change. once she starts talking about ex's its other.

you should her given her the smackdown as soo as she mentioned her ex the first time. if she does not like it, move on. you are not there to waste your time with girls talking about their problems. you watn to spend time having fun with her, talking about her and you.

Keep her as a friend, but not on a regular basis. hang out with her at parties and use her as a wing man. thats the closest you are going to get to pussy with her. IF she really likes you as a friend, rather than an emotional tampon to dump her negative drama on you she will help you get girls. if not leave her, cuase she dont care about you, she just using you.

ok the hole story is iv'e known this girl since i was with my ex and she would see me and my ex together but then we both broke up with our ex's and she went back with him the only reason y i kept talkin to her was because she always would give me ioi's touching me and saying naughty shit but its like cannibus says fuck her ive stopped talking to her and yesterday i saw her but didnt even acknowledge her and moments after she came runnin to give me a hug, either way its true what u guys are saying im not anybodys emotional tampon and if she wants me to listen to shit like that she better b giving something back

i treat her just like a girl i know now thats it!