MyPUAJourney Forum

i got a message over the weekend from my friend explaining what has happened recently. things have gotten way worse as far as him being able to turn it around lol. i'll mention it tomorrow as i start to right my reply to him. also i've still got some questions form contact disturbed i need to answer in the online gaming thread. looks like i've got some more typing to do tomorrow.

I am going on a cottage trip with a student club this weekend. I am for the first time scared about it.

there will be 2 girl there that I made out with during the last 3 weeks, they both came on to me. I don't know how to choose, I don't even want to choose, because then I will have to start a relationship with one of them.

this is a milestone for me

for the first time I have put myself in a really undesirable situation (I dread it) because I have picked up too many girls

Good job Hope! Now have a threesome!

@ hope

Been in your shoes man. OK, Advice. Take a step back. Breathe. Good. Here's the reality of the situation (as you've presented it) All you did was make out with them. You've certainly seen here and in the community that kissing a girl is not a big deal. It isn't. Unless you've told either of these girls that they're "the one" or started a relationship with them (which you even mention you haven't) then I say "So what?" Get ahold of yourself man and reclaim your alpha-ness. You kissed a coupla girls, that's not a big deal. For all you know, they've both gone on to make out with 6 guys each since they made out with you. Since you don't have anything concrete with either of them, then I say who cares if they find out that you've made out with one of them? If confronted by either of them - or both of them, I'd point that out to them. I'd then follow it up with asking them why it bothers them so much (since there's nothing concrete between you). You have the opportunity to use jealousy here to your advantage (Remember what I've said before - jealousy is just an unpleasant way of finding out how much you really like someone!) You may be able to spin this into a great weekend with one of them - maybe even both?

I don't want to belittle your stress for a second, as I said, I've been in your shoes, and I know that feeling - especially when you like them both - but when you start feeling "panicy" stop for a moment and remind yourself of the facts, and that is: it's only a kiss (or a hundred kisses). It could be worse, you could have slept with them both. Hang in there!

It turned out to be a fun weekend, with one of the girls , the otherone started to play around with a guy when the first girl came on to me VERY strongly. she told me that she thinks i flirt too much with too many girls. I think that is why she went so strong for me. not looking for a relationship, but i think she is

btw:
@EyeCandy

It is neither my goal nor my interest to have a threesome

Nicely handled Hope! Just analyzing the situation, The girl who started playing around with another guy... Did you notice that? She couldn't have you, so she started fooling around with someone else right away. That's the aforementioned jealousy I suggested you use if confronted, and she was likely trying to do it to you to make you feel jealous (so you'd realize how much you liked her and chase her / fall into a frame where she is in control - which you didn't - nicely done!) I think a lot of women act out on jealousy plots without even realizing it as a way to manipulate us into the chase. Don't get me wrong, she may well have known exactly what she was doing, and did it intentionally, but who's to say? What matters is how you handled it, and it sounds as if you did a great job.

I think it's good to look at these things in retrospect to learn from them from a perspective of how women behave, and through this understanding be able to identify it in the future, but I think that to analyze a situation while it's occurring is a mistake. Constant analysis will fuck up your game, but playing the situation back and learning from its generalities after the fact is good and will help you in the future. Thanks for updating us!

i can't wait for tonight - halloween party. i love halloween parties and at this present time my game has never been more solid. i'm also in the best shape ever both physically and mentally. should be a hell of a lot of fun. i predict great things.

Today I went out for the halloween at the last minute.. I am really new to this stuff, i could not even finish that hi challange thing.. Today i was walking to upstairs, the girl told me that if i can walk behind her because people are staring her to see her under panties, i said yes.. after that i told her that she needs to buy me a drink for that now.. well she was laughing and shocked and i said that s ok i was kidding and leave. well i needed to go actually.. but i know that i could take it a little bit far from there.. still i could not even say hi to more than 3 people yet. so that was good enough for me for now lol. i know i should have told her this before i even start to walk behind her.

Woi:

Do you actually talk to people? do you have friends?

I think you do, and because of this you already know how to be social.

If you want to get used to talking to strangers, how about this, find out a place you want to go, but know where it is. Dont think about how to get there, or check a map, or use your mind. Got out to some where near it, and ask random people who are sranding around. remmeber to smile.

this has happened to me before the girl asking to stand behind her. It was with a firend, she was wearing a tight nurse outfit, i said ok, then she walked up and i stood still, and she looked behind, and i told her, "yeah, its true you do need need some one to stand behind you". she laughed, i smiled. it was fun.

You did so well with theask her for the drink. Never tell her you were kidding, even if you have to leave. it shows lack of confidence. if you had time, you could have changed the subject such as: " before you buy me a drink, how about telling me your name"; then you can always refer back to her buying you a drink such as: "we have been talking for some time, and you still havent bought me a drink, it seems you are trying to distract me. Well it aint working, you going to have to do something more to distract me"

Think about this, for the hi challenge. you are not taking from people when you approach them, you are not manipulating them. All you are doing is being social. So being social means, you are giving to them, what you are giving them is a good time, fun excitement, memories, stories to tell their friends. so in fact you are doing a good deed.

woi:

when ever i read your posts, i can relate to them quite well. when i first started all of this, i was very much the same. earlier today i had typed out a long message that i felt contained some insightful firsthand information you could benefit from. however i had this page sitting idle for too long so when i went to hit submit, it took me back to the long in page and i was unable to recover what i had spent a good while typing up. this isn't the first time this site has done that to me, but in the past i was able to go back and recover what i typed. this time it made me click a button to get the reply box to open up, so when i hit back on my web browser, the message i wrote was gone and clicking the button didn't bring it back either. basically i wasted a good 12 minutes typing up a message for you and lost it all.

i was kinda ticked about it and left my computer because i wasn't about to type it back up. i don't even really remember what i typed either.

any way, i'll type some up on here in here soon, but i won't be nearly as insightful as my first message. also i recommend reading what i'm about to type up in the thread titled Halloween!!!. i'll try to make the first bit some what insightful before i get into the story part of it.

today I am going to use the line "this is a good pickup line" on girls that I have been flirting with.

Ill post a fieldreport from last night later today, or tomorrow

Here's a rundown of a day 1 with a girl I met online and a random rant I thought someone might find useful.

When I began trying to get better at PU and socializing in general I used to be too slow/afraid when it came to doing anything, now it seems I don't worry enough lol. I met this girl online a week or so ago and she agreed to meet me yesterday. I picked her up from her place to go play some pool. There were several poolhalls between her place and mine that we could have gone to, but I made sure to make excuses to go to the one by my apartment, mainly by just saying "Oops, oh well I already passed it".

I wanted to challenge myself to see how fast I could get her in bed. This girl never played pool before which made for some great kino. I was doing my usual teasing and hugging her a lot, she was surprisingly receptive hugging back very tight (the fun we were having helped a ton I'm sure). After about half an hour she was shaking when trying to take a shot. I don't know if she was nervous because I was laughing so much or because I made her nervous due to attraction. Either way my plan was to get her out of there ASAP. I made fun of her shaking and she refused to take another shot... just what I wanted to hear.

We walked out onto the street and I mentioned how hard it was to find anything worth doing on a sunday night. So I told her we should get some pizza and watch a movie, making sure not to mention we'd be doing this in my apartment. She agreed and we got in my car. Of course she then asked where we'd be going and started saying she didn't want to be locked up in an apartment, she suggested we go out and get some ice cream. I repeated that I wanted pizza. She suggested going to a restaurant, and before I could reply she added "oh, but you're craving pizza...". She agreed to come over if we picked up some ice cream first... not a problem, I live pretty much across the street from a Baskin Robins. This might be considered having lost the frame, but I had the whole night to win it back. Within an hour of meeting this girl (in person anyways), I had her in my apartment.

I purposely have a futon in front of my TV instead of a sofa so when a girl sits next to me, we are really laying down (I only leave the part your head rests on inclined, the rest laying out flat). She of course sat in my computer chair instead of the futon. That's where my Wii came into play. I put on guitar hero and let her play a song. When she finished I told her to hand me the guitar, I then grabbed her hand and sat her next to me (wining back control and positioning her in a convenient spot all in one shot!). I played a song, gave the guitar to her and put my arm around her while she played. I started kissing her, but she was a little cold at first. We had known each other for less than 2 hours at this point and were alone in my apartment, I get why a girl might be a little afraid. I ignored her a little, and then put my head on her lap and told her to run her fingers through my hair (my hair is short, I just like having my head rubbed lol, plus I was making sure to keep control after a rejection). After that we got into some heavier making out. That's as far as I made it though... Towards the end of the night I KNOW she wanted it.

She asked if I could take her back home, and I said ok. I got up on my knees to stand up (we were still laying on the futon), but she stayed laying down. She would then pull me towards her or she would jump on me for some more kissing. She did this for a good half hour if not longer, jumping on me every time I said I was taking her home, but she wouldn't let me take any of her clothes off. Had I not moved so fast before I'm certain I would have been in there. I fucked myself by bringing up her anti-slut defense too early. I'm kind of upset because physically she is VERY much my type, but considering the texts she's sent since I know it won't be long. Oh well, you learn through trial and error, this was definitely an error lol! I'll keep my hands off the goods for a while longer next time. There wasn't an aweful lot of talking or anything so there's not much else to add to this FR. I had never really tried going straight for the kill this quickly before, pretty interesting results, the girl seems hooked.

On a side note... as I've said in previous posts, I can sometimes have a tough time carrying a conversation. I like to read dating articles on news websites to get a laugh out of their AFCness, but I saw a comment left by a girl that got me thinking. She was saying how she doesn't like guys using emoticons (smileys). I realized how much I rely on them when typing, and how they keep me from practicing putting my thoughts into words. Sometimes I'd reply to a text with just a smiley face. I decided to ban myself from using them in hopes of improving my communication skills, and it's worked. I find myself getting better responses to texts/emails, and after a month or so of doing it I've been noticing it carrying over to verbal communication too. I've always been the guy to give one word answers to everything, this has really helped turn that around. Maybe it's just coincidence, maybe not. Either way I thought it would be good to share that. If you tend to send a smiley or sad face with every text, cut it out and you'll see you they only "help" in keeping you from a developing a deeper conversation.

@latin lover

loved that experience you had, next time use more paragraphs, easier to read.

Anyway, how about doing this. Next time you see, you dont excalate on your date. do normal social touching, but dont go for kisses or hugs, just talk, get her talking , get her investing in the conversation. See what happens. Its not as if she is not sure she is into you. so you being gay or not man enough (scared of escalating) is not the issue. This will help build the sexual tension. as she will expect you to make a move on you. it is kind of like playing hot and cold, girls do this a lot to guys. maybe even a sort of push pull or sexual obstacle i guess.

When i have done this, girls tend to escalate me, touching me more, hands on my legs, or legs on my legs, trying to hold my hand, trying to kiss me when our faces are close. it is funny, cause you know they want you to do something, yet you dont. you can even do like fake kisses - going close to her when she is ready to be kissed, then move back out or go for a hug and not kiss her. If you go dancing at a club, and it is like, moving in close then moving her away.

I have even done this to a girl i was about to shag in bed, making out, hands all over, most clothes off. then just as i was about to ask the question - "give me a sec, let me get some protection". I stoped and looked into her eyes and said, i got to go. She was shocked, she asked why, and i replied - "i dont sleep with girls on the first date, i need to get to know them better first". now she was even more shocked, i was crackign up inside. She did get a bit moody, but i brushed it aside, and left leaving on good terms. Met up again a couple of days later, and things went quick, no lmr, straigth to her room and bish bash done.