MyPUAJourney Forum

hope · by **hope** on Sat Aug 15, 2009 1:55 pm

hi, I feel I have had sort of a breakthough this week. I have been out almost every nigth. the girls have responded well to me. had k-closes, and numbercloses. I have set up a few dates.

I was pondering something.

Yesterday I asked a girl for her number, and i said i would send her a text next week, then we would go for a coffe or something. Did i block myself from texting her before? should I text her before? I really have no info about her. what should i text? i was thinking; "how are you? had a good weekend? coffe tomorow at A?"

Christopher_Walken · by **Christopher_Walken** on Sun Aug 16, 2009 6:06 am

canibus1990 wrote:@Christopher_Walken

Interesting interaction.

I believe it is the type of women you find challenging which makes you attracted to them. The easy ones get boring after a while. this applies to women as well. and why a lot of tactics are about making us more challenging.

When girls are smart, not only brain smart, but street smart, they are going to be tough customers, cause they will want the best men. why cause they have high self esteem. So there tests are going to be stronger, cause more of a reaction, etc.

Every girl will ask you what you do. They want to build a picture of you. This is a great time to go into a bit of a story of your dreams and how you do what you do, the motivations, the whys, the joys etc. I think it is called a grounding routine.

The only problem is when and how she asks that question. This will show whether she is into you, or testing you. This takes experience.

Generally, i go down the cocky funny route the first time- saying some odd job, which is obviously not real, and see if she laughs or asks again, then i talk about what i do.

But the second question, is obviously, a test. Straight away, i would think she is seeing what kind of reaction i am giving. But you saying "i make enough", you are already qualifying your self. she has taken control of the conversation.

you should have ignored the question, maybe smiled with eye contact and paused, then changed topics. OR you could think of a cocky funny response - "i actually earn 2 strips of bacon and a half a slice a bread every day, sometimes i get a bonus of ketchup and at christmass i get a boiled egg. I am so lucky"

The third quesiton

Her: So how is that making the world a better place? (quite a deep question! However I felt she genuinely wanted to hear my answer, so I answered directly)

Well again i would have made a funny response - " well, i go around the world, saving people who are bored, and bring excitement to their lives, especially people working on laptops, listening to music, and thinking really hard how to give people a hard time.." give a smirk at the end.

If you cant think of responses, use a pause,and if nothing happens, change subjects. if she really is into it, then answer her.

you did right with the number request, telling her that face book is crap.

I would ask, was she having a good time while talking with you? Was she laughing? was she maintaining eye contact? was she facing you while talking? Was she interested in you answers? was she comfortable talking to you?

If the answer is no, then why would she want to talk to you again, why would she want to speak to you.

a good way to ask for a nmber is to Walk away, say bye, and turn around after a step then ask for the number

She takes my phone and says the most ultra, mega, qualifier ever:

"Why should I give you my phone number?"

Again i would do the over top response, but not answer her question -
"Thats right... you should give me you home number - in case your mobile is off, your address - in case i am in your neighbourhood, your email - in case you are at your computer doing work, your parents number - in case you are over there, your best friend number - in case i want to surprise you, possiblly missing person number - in case you are lost. But lets just start with your mobile.

or you could do the deangelo routine

"I understand, dont worry, am only going to call you like 20 times a day and block up your phone with messages." if she is shocked you can add..
"Oh am sorry, that was rude of me, i will call 35 times a day, cause your extra special."

I assume this is during the day, personally i would have gone straight for direct opener.

[/quote]

Cannibus you are right on many, if not all points. Many of the girls I approach are not only attractive, but highly intelligent. I generally sarge close to the local university, and many of the girls I talk to end up being in grad school or on the path to a professional career. In fact, now that I think about it ... I've never really spoken to a girl who has a lackluster job or career (like folding clothes at an Old Navy for example). Generally they end up being girls trying to get teaching masters degrees, nursing degrees, pre-med or pre-law, girls with MBA's. I dunno, I guess I have some sort of intelligence radar.

The bottom line is I have to be prepared for hoop-jumping in the future with these high quality females. I am going to take your advice and do more evasion plus cocky/funny if they try to qualify me.

Rhetoric · by **Rhetoric** on Sun Aug 16, 2009 6:29 pm

hope wrote:I was pondering something.

Yesterday I asked a girl for her number, and i said i would send her a text next week, then we would go for a coffe or something. Did i block myself from texting her before? should I text her before? I really have no info about her. what should i text? i was thinking; "how are you? had a good weekend? coffe tomorow at A?"

no, you're not blocked at all man. you can text her whenever you want really. you should text before if the time span between meeting and future date is far between. calling is even better, but you have to make sure your phone game is tight. also make sure she's responding to texts first before calling. a lot of times a girl won't answer the phone too early on in an interaction.

texts should always appear non-needy. texts used only to keep her thinking of you shouldn't require a response but should be worded so that a response is likely. i can give more examples if you need them, but a few are listed below. when you plan a date, make it appear as if you're going regardless of her attendance and that she SHOULD come along. also, don't ask a stream of questions like in your example. use more statements. instead of asking if she had a good weekend, just say you hope she had a good weekend. too many questions in a text looks too needy and too interview style. interrogation isn't seduction. also try to tie in something from the previous interaction so she knows exactly who you are.

some examples i've used for first messages:

once i commented on a girl's shoes and how she reminded me of a cowgirl and also mentioned how she needed to go home and feed her horses (she has no horses btw) so i texted the next day, "hey cowgirl, hope you remembered to feed the horses." this required no response, but of course i got one.

another girl from last weekend was sitting next to a broken chair and i accused her of breaking it. the next day i texted, "hey what's up? i hope you aren't breaking any more chairs." this way she knew exactly who i was.

basic examples to plan a date with:

"hey, some friends and are heading to XXX saturday night. it's gonna be a lot of fun, you should come along." this is if you can gather up some friends to go with you like to a club or something.

"i'm planning on grabbing a coffee monday for lunch over at XXX. you should come along, they've got the best YYY you'll ever taste."

Rhetoric · by **Rhetoric** on Sun Aug 16, 2009 10:44 pm

Hey qix and canibus, thanks for the help guys, i appreciate it. that actually helps me out quite a bit.

qixsilver · by **qixsilver** on Mon Aug 17, 2009 9:35 am

anytime

canibus1990 · by **canibus1990** on Tue Aug 18, 2009 8:50 am

no problems rhetoric. Just tell me your secret,

What hair gel do you use to keep that blond hair of yours sticking up?

qixsilver · by **qixsilver** on Tue Aug 18, 2009 2:31 pm

@ Canibus

about the hair gel, have you ever seen something about Mary?... j/k Rhetoric, we know it's all that testosterone.

Rhetoric · by **Rhetoric** on Wed Aug 19, 2009 1:07 pm

eeh. i'm a little embarrassed to admit it, but qix is right. i got the idea from that very movie. i only use this method because it's 100% all natural and i seem to have an unlimited supply of it at the moment.

hope · by **hope** on Fri Aug 21, 2009 9:55 pm

LOL, I told a friend to be outgoing, friendly, confident and lively (and not an asshole). what he got from it was; be a kind nice guy (other word in norwegian; kinda means looser nice).

be careful about what you tell your friends.

another friend of mine told me what he heard I told the first guy. I was like "NOOO I WOULD NEVER TÈLL ANYBODY THAT!!!! he must have missunderstood, that shit is just WRONG"

hope · by **hope** on Tue Aug 25, 2009 9:41 am

This is not meant as bragging, this is more of a progress report, I have stayed away from prewritten material, and come up with some of my own.

I have been doing great these past few weeks.

I have a starting relationship with a foreign student that I think looks for a fling.

I have a girl chasing me

I have 3 girls that have asked for my numbers, and wanna set up dates with me. (k-closed all of them )

I gave them all rules on how I want it done (do you think these rules are a good Idea?)
1: Send a text, don't call
2: send It at least the day before
3. it has to be during the day.
4. I might be busy.

Idea was that they are the ones that has to please me, not the other way around.

I also got 2 serious flirts going on.

It seems that my work has finally brought a lot of fruit, in a very short period (2 weeks)

I also have fun quotes from girls,
"you already kissed me, so you have to do it again NOW"
"wow, I only meet you 4 hours ago"

I also wonder about some of my own material.

"Have you seen monkeys?
in the naturechannel?
they are sitting picking on each others back heads.
It is both to stay clean, and to build bonds.
(kinda like how we humans often talk to each other about nothing)
I think that it is funny that the emotional response still is with us humans today, I'll show you"

then I put my hand on their back head and use my fingers to massage that area, for a few minutes (like 2-3).

that usually gives them a happy pleasureful look on their face. I tell them that, and when I remove my hand I ask that "that felt good, didn't it?"

this is ofc not the way I start with KINO.

^^please tell my what you think about this too

Rhetoric · by **Rhetoric** on Tue Aug 25, 2009 6:36 pm

HOPE:

nice work man. now that the momentum is building, your best bet is to keep it going. it's funny how pivotal success in this area of life often comes in chunks instead of pieces. you can spend months on end chipping away at the plateau you may find yourself on, but usually once you take a new direction or make a realization you tend to grow by leaps and bounds. what i'm getting at is that once you seem to get one girl attracted it seems so much easier to get others. it allows you to be truly outcome independent.

either way, you've mentioned how you wonder about your own material. personally i wouldn't use that as an opener (i'm not certain if you even are), but it seems like a good bit to stack forward with. it's different, playful, and allows for easy conversation and kino. plus if it's working for you, why change it. as they say, "if it aint broke, don't fix it." what works for you may not work for others, but if you've had success with it, go for it.

Rhetoric · by **Rhetoric** on Tue Aug 25, 2009 6:56 pm

QUESTION:

this is kind of similar to what i was asking about last time with some slight differences. once again it deals with qualifying.

as i've mentioned a few times, i've been screwing around on facbook, trying out my facebook game since i haven't done any prior to recent times in over two years. normally i'm not too concerned with the outcome, but i quite like this one girl's personality and wouldn't mind setting up an actual date with her in the near future. plus i figure this could happen in real life too so best to figure it out now.

basically my situation is like this: i've been talking to this one girl over facebook and have qualified her quite a bit. she's been surprisingly responsive to the questions and has answered them all quite well and most of them in detail. the odd thing is that she has yet to ask me any serious questions other than a few joking ones that are based on my opener which involved a pseudo marriage, pet, etc.

i'm not sure how to gauge this situation - is it an IOD, a desire for me to lead all aspects of the conversation...?

recently in real life, face to face interactions, i've noticed that if i start to tell a girl a few things about myself to kind of let her into my reality and let her know who i am, it usually leads to her qualifying more and/or asking questions. should i try this same approach on line. in other words should i briefly tell a little about myself each time even though i'm not being asked. for example i asked her recently what she always wanted to be when she was younger. she answered it in detail so i decided to mention two things i wanted to be as a kid in the next message i sent. i just sent it, so i don't know how it's perceived.

thanks for any advice.

hope · by **hope** on Wed Aug 26, 2009 3:24 am

Rhetoric wrote:QUESTION:

basically my situation is like this: i've been talking to this one girl over facebook and have qualified her quite a bit. she's been surprisingly responsive to the questions and has answered them all quite well and most of them in detail. the odd thing is that she has yet to ask me any serious questions other than a few joking ones that are based on my opener which involved a pseudo marriage, pet, etc.

i'm not sure how to gauge this situation - is it an IOD, a desire for me to lead all aspects of the conversation...?

should i try this same approach on line. in other words should i briefly tell a little about myself each time even though i'm not being asked. for example i asked her recently what she always wanted to be when she was younger. she answered it in detail so i decided to mention two things i wanted to be as a kid in the next message i sent. i just sent it, so i don't know how it's perceived. .

hmm, what I am thinking is, she is answering you in detail, that i think is good
I think the problem with she not asking about you is that I belive it means that you are not building enough comfort. I mean that when she qualify you it builds some comfort, not to much but enough to make her be secure about who you are. If the girl knows nothing about you I think it will be harder to get a date with her. Just think about it, right now you are a fun internet conversation, she plays the game bc she enjoys it, but she has not tried to figure out what kind of guy you are.(if I read your post correctly). I think the Idea to post some info about you is a good way to start building the comfort levels you need to build.

this is at least my initial reaction, maybe I am wrong, maybe not, I don't know.

EDIT:
yea I use it after I have started KINO, not as an opener, more of a comfort tool

but what did you think of the rules?

hope wrote:I gave them all rules on how I want it done (do you think these rules are a good Idea?)
1: Send a text, don't call
2: send It at least the day before
3. it has to be during the day.
4. I might be busy.

qixsilver · by **qixsilver** on Thu Aug 27, 2009 7:31 am

@rhetoric

I think it's tough to give an accurate answer to your question. Some girls are relatively self centered, and it may just not be on her radar to ask questions about you. In my opinion, it's time to escalate into something in the real world. I think you'll get a better read on whether or not she's interested if you can spend some face time with her vs some facebook time with her.

Besides, her acceptance to meet in real life alone is a pretty big ioi in my opinion.

jaffy · by **jaffy** on Tue Sep 01, 2009 2:10 am

I don't care how kinky you are but "I had my period today" is not a part of good foreplay.

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